It doesn’t weigh heavily on me, but it does make me VERY sad… about life, humanity, the meaning of being.. and who we are. I don’t think about it constantly, but when it enters my mind, I think about the old studies of people who have brain trauma, and their personality completely alters, so that the original person is totally gone.
Scientists studied this phenomenon, about trauma and aphasia…. and handed it to the philosophers for the clinching proof that the monist argument, that mind and body are one, and that if the soul exists it exists somewhere else in the body than the brain.
There was a railroad worker that was driving spikes, and the driver launched one back at him, piercing his skull. He didn’t die, but a once dedicated husband and hard worker became a foul mouthed alcoholic who was into child pornography and unfaithful to his wife, and lousy at his job. It is terrible tragedy.. that the inner workings of our brain are so infinitely complex that the individual and person we once were totally disappeared.
This being said, so did my wife. I don’t like or care for the intellect or mind that is in the shell of Annmarie… but my wife doesn’t exist anymore. It is worse than having died… i t almost makes me question if she ever existed. She did and does, in my heart. I miss her very much.
But the body and form and vehicle that is Annmarie’s outer shell and body… is housing a new and different mentality and intellect that is hollow and lost and it makes me very sad.
But I don’t think about it much.
Just right now apparently.
huh.
Well….